I was listening to ESPN radio on the way to the Dodger game hoping that the LeBron decision would be revealed in the first 10 minutes of the special as promised.  It wasn't.  LeBron eventually said South Beach, which meant I could put the music back on.  I went back and found the rest of the interview.  Ok, no I didn't, but here's how I imagine it went down.

Gray:  LeBron, it must be a relief to be done with this period in your life.  But with your going to Miami, I'll ask the question I'm sure everyone wants to know, who takes the last shot, you or Dwyane?

LeBron:  Well, you know, I'm just looking forward to the opportunity.  It's been a great process.

Gray (inner monologue):  Crap, I went off script.  He didn't notice.  Which question was I supposed to ask next?  . . . Found it!  Phew!

Gray:  LeBron, a lot of people will see you joining Dwyane's Heat with Chris Bosh and say that you couldn't win a title as a team's go to guy.  What do you say to those people?

LeBron:  There's not much to say.  I can't win because an offense running through me involves the other four guys standing still doing nothing.  That's not an offense.  I need to be more of a swingman and play second fiddle. 

Gray:  Second fiddle?  You don't strike me as a second fiddle guy LeBron.

LeBron:  I don't really know what that means actually.  Leon told me to say it to sound more humble.

Gray:  I see.  It would seem that a team with your athleticism would be best suited with a run and gun mentality.  But Pat Riley is a defensive coach and has been since the Showtime days.  With his rings, you won't be able to boss him around like you did Mike Brown.  How do you see your team performing in a half court game against teams with legitimate centers?

LeBron:  Not well.

Gray:  Of course, so what position will you play?  Wade is more of a 2 guard now.  Do you move to the 3 or play the 5 because Bosh ways 40 pounds less than you.

LeBron:  I think I can play the 1 and the 5, kind of like Magic, only with a lot more of an ego, less charisma, a selfish as opposed to selfless leaning, and five fewer championships.

Gray:  That sounds about right.  So who takes less money of the three of you to make this work financially?

LeBron:  Less money? 

Gray:  Um, you know what they say, mo money, mo problems.

LeBron:  That's not true, mo money means you can pay more people to take care of your problems then tell you how great you are.

Gray:  Good point LeBron.

LeBron:  Thanks man, you know, this is a big moment for you too.  You get to interview King James.  This is bigger than when you treated Pete Rose like crap and then the next day after Chad Curtis hit that game winning homer in the playoffs, you interviewed him and he said he and the guys decided not to talk to you and he said hi to his grandma instead.  Then you just stared at the camera. 

Gray (staring in disbelief):  LeBron, going back to x's and o's, let's say for argument's sake that Dwyane brings the ball up; won't your lack of a jumper make you easier to guard off the ball?

LeBron:  I don't think so, I'll come off curls to go to the rim because other teams will think I may pass to Bosh, which I won't.  If Dwyane is going to get his points then I gotta get mine too.

Gray:  Of course, because otherwise people won't think it's your team.

LeBron:  Exactly, every team I go to is my team.  I'm King James.  I make people say "wow" more than anyone else in the league by far.  That's like winning championships but better.

Gray:  I couldn't agree more.  LeBron, I'm getting word that Cavs majority owner, Dan Gilbert, has released an open letter regarding your decision and it's not very kind.

LeBron:  That's because Dan doesn't understand how this works.  It's not about where I win, or how many times I win, or loyalty or any of that.

Gray:  What is it about?

LeBron:  The King James brand.  We're going global!

Gray:  What's your gameplan there King?

LeBron:  I don't know, Leon told me to say that too.  But I like the idea of global.  They liked my documentary in China.  So that's good.

Gray:  It's not bad, I'll tell you that.  Speaking of not bad, how did Florida's lack of a state income tax affect your decision?

LeBron (staring blankly and semi-smiling):  You know, I'm just looking forward to the opportunity.

Gray (inner monologue):  Wait, I'm on-script.  What's going on?  Whatever, we're almost done.

Gray:  LeBron, this isn't the first time you, Dwyane, and Chris have teamed together is it.

LeBron:  No, we played in the Olympics together in 2008.  That's where we figured out the best way to stick it to Cleveland.

Gray:  That was a tough tournament.  How did you guys bring home the gold?

LeBron:  Well, we just played as a team, trusted each other and gave 110%.

Gray:  You mean everybody freaked out and Kobe saved the day against Spain.

LeBron:  Yes.

Gray:  What happened the previous time the three of you played together in a game that mattered?

LeBron:  We lost a tough game to a very tough opponent.  What can I say?  Sometimes you run into a great team.

Gray:  We're talking 2006 FIBA semi-finals here I take it.  Who did you lose to?

LeBron:  Greece.

Gray:  Yeah, they're tough.  How many NBA players did they have?

LeBron:  None.

Gray:  Of course.  Well LeBron, it's been an honor and a pleasure.  Thank you for the opportunity to share this spotlight with you.  If there's any media guy who understands how you work, it's me. 

LeBron:  King James says you're welcome.